About Me

  • My name is Tamara.
  • I’m half of a married lesbian couple in Toronto, Ontario.
  • I’m a child and youth counsellor and I work in a classroom for children with autism.
  • I like to knit, write, read, cook, cycle, and I think that the Muppets are a work of comedic genius.
  • My wife’s name is Lauren and she’s awesome.
  • We spent 8 months trying to conceive before I got pregnant in March 2013.
  • In spite of an uneventful pregnancy, we learned at our 20 week ultrasound that our son had severe brain and eye anomolies.  We chose to have labour induced at 22 weeks after it was determined that he would not survive.  We lost Ezra on August 6.
  • We’re getting by.  Learning to live without my son is by far, the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
  • We conceived our daughter in January 2014 and she was born after an anxiety-filled pregnancy on October 3rd, healthy and screaming her head off.

7 Responses to About Me

  1. Monique says:

    Tamara, I’m so sorry about Ezra. I know how loved and wanted he was and it is heartbreaking that he is not here, where he belongs. I found you on Glow and related to your comment (everything happens for a reason = bullshit). My son was stillborn on August 8, 2008 at 37 weeks – you never forget and but the pain becomes more manageable in time, Hoping you and Lauren find some peaceful moments coming your way.

  2. Thank you so much. I’m so sorry to hear about your son.

  3. Allison says:

    Hi Tamara,
    I just started reading your blog and didn’t want to just leave a comment on one of your posts. Anyway, glad to have stumbled across you, though the loss of your son leaves me heartbroken.
    Wishing you the best,
    -Allison.

  4. Hi Tamara,
    Just wanted to say hi. I’m half of a lesbian couple in Chicago, IL, and I also like to knit, write, read and cycle, and I have already blocked the date of the next Muppets movie on my calendar so I can pre-order tickets. My awesome wife is Kate, and after many years of waiting to have a baby (steady jobs and incomes, and all that), we lost our first son, Anderson, at 28 weeks due to a plancental abruption. I’m loving following your blog as you echo many of my own sentiments as we wait until I’m physically able to try again with another pregnancy (September… so far away!).
    Best,
    Caitlin

  5. pepibebe says:

    Hi, I’ve been a very intermittent blogger for the last few months as we’ve been really stuck with no donor then some big hiccups in the journey – again. It’s back to looking hopeful, so I’m likely to be back reading and blogging again more often. I send you all the very best wishes and hopes for your current pregnancy from a small rural coastal town in New Zealand.

  6. Devan Davis says:

    Hi Tamara,

    I’m so sorry for the loss of your son. I am also one half of a married lesbian couple, and we lost our son Rohen at 20 weeks after learning that he had placental abnormalities at 18 weeks. We tried again and are currently expecting twins! I am looking forward to following your blog. Best of luck!!

    – Devan

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